Monday, August 28, 2006

Paparazzi!

Our crack paparazzi have done it again. Last night we saw Princesss Sushitushi (aka Taro Tanaka, that wacky Cultmaster Douglas Wilson) at the Emmy Awards as she gallivanted across the red carpet in this stunning chiffon gown, lined with a soft ruffle above her bust (chest?) line. After the ceremony she snuck out the backdoor with her escort, whom she calls Über-tripe, who wore a pair of jumper cables over his naked torso. Rumor has it these two have been steaming the windows since 2003 in an on-again off-again romance, and every time she dumps him, the jilted gigolo leaves some schnitzengruben in her mailbox. But last night they were on-again and our paparazzo caught them the moment she threw the switch. Zap! We call it Torrid Tanaka Gives a Royal Shock. Looks like someone blew a fuse! Oh, Princess, we know you can’t speak for Doug, but preach to us about your anointing!